Wednesday, March 23, 2016

WHY EVEN TRY?


I've tried before..... I've tried and failed. I've tried and succeeded. But I've never succeeded without trying...  Thats the nuts of it.. 

I woke up this morning and I'm ready to embark on a 6 month odyssey. Then I look at the weather forcast for Amicalola Falls State Park, Ga. (My start point for The Appalachian Trail.). tomorrows forcast is 100% chance of rain. Do I postpone my start by one day.? What should i do.? I'm of two minds.. Fuck it... sometimes it rains... I'm not gonna have 6months of sunshine... "Endeavor to persevere". Or maybe I'll just wait until tomorrow... I'll leave that up to my friend who is driving me to my starting point...  It matters not to me... 

Some folks have asked,,, (I'll rephrase the question), Why, ? a 48 yr old out of shape, disabled, Veteran with a "Mental Disorder"would even attempt to hike the Appalachian Trail.? my answer is this..... For all those reasons and more. ... I sought the help of the VA.. I did... They kicked me out saying that I was angry and a non conformist.. While there, I found my bearing again... I now know WHY... I now know WHAT.  (read the last few entries into this blog). Some have called this "a Spiritual Journey". I think they are part right.. I'm going exploring in the wilderness.. Some of that will be on a dirt path. Some of that will be in the darkness of my mind..  

I have a Dream.. Its called, "THE VETERAN DIGNITY PROJECT". you will be hearing a lot about this from me soon.. My goal is to help Veterans and by doing so, improve The Veterans Administration.. The wheels have been set in motion to do accomplish that goal.. This trail will give me the guidance and direction to best fulfill this mission.

You might be asking... "What can I do to help?"....... I have no earthly idea.. I'm headed north and thats about all I know... I will be stopping in to check on a friend and defile his hottub for a bit, around mid to late April.. If you think of something that I might need or enjoy,, my mail address will be,
Don Wood
21Pressley rd.
Ashville, NC 28805
(PS.. nothing packs lighter than cash.). just sayin... Paypal. donwood223@gmail.com

I will be taking my laptop, a camera and my video gear on the trail with me. When I find WIFI in the towns along the trail I will be posting updates to the blog and Facebook... If you have not yet, Please. click on the follow button on my facebook page. the more followers I have the more "Marketable" this adventure could be..

Thank you all for your support and encouragements. You give me more than I can ever repay..

until next time,
Peace&Grease


  

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

It just takes Time.

"How are You?"
We pass by each other and they ask, "How You doin?" In the VA hospital I encountered hundreds of people who do not know me.. Without slowing their pace or even maintaining eye contact they would ask in passing, "How are You today?" As if it was a pre programmed greeting.. With no time to listen for a response. If they cared they would wait for a response.. People don't care. Not enough to honestly be interested. There hasn't been enough trust built yet for me to tell the truth.. yeah. Its sad but we all know its the truth..

"I'm fine. and You?" They are far enough past me that my question to them is not responded to. I've lost the ability to continue this phony game of human contact.. It took me to a bitter place and I didn't like it there.. "Fine" is a lie. Its a cover up. It's as dishonest as we can possibly be... So I changed the ways I respond... I'm good. Who, Me.? Above Ground. Peachy. or completely disregard their question and reply, "Sir, or Ma'am.". This isn't a new thing for me.. I've been avoiding that question, "How You doin?" for most of my life.. I can imagine their heads exploding if I actually replied truthfully.

Imagine this scenario.
I'm not doing well today. I woke up remembering all  the horrific things i saw in my sleep last night. I didn't sleep much because of it.. The insomnia is related to my depression and the suicidal thoughts usually don't wait till after breakfast. I've been thinking about a grieving friend who lost their child to disease and is not coping well. The morning news has me convinced that the government is corrupt and that the election is rigged.  The VA has forgot its mission statement and there is no one who honors their Oath of Office. We have people living and dying in the streets every day while some have more than they can spend. No, I don't want them to be governed into doing whats right.. but their greed has effected their humanity..  and How are you.?

As a member of this species, we are compelled to care for one another.. that includes our time. It takes time and effort to be concerned for your fellow man.. If I ask you, How are you.? I want the truth. If you say, Fine. Im calling Bullshit. We Are Not Fine. Each of us have our own issues and demons. Each of us need the counsel of our dear friends. thats what friends do.. I remember learning early, "you got two ears and one mouth, listen twice as much". Listen to people. yes, it might be the wrong time or setting to have that conversation but,,, let them know that you care. that you are willing to listen if they want to talk.. Engage people. We all need help. and sometimes, the best advice comes from strangers. (tell your problem to a stranger and, trust me, you will get an opinion..)

Helping others benefits you. Do you remember how good you felt the last time you truly helped someone..? I call them warm fuzzies.. We all have the ability to help someone. and we all know someone who needs help.. A restaurant gift card for your neighbors date night. Yeah, volunteer to watch their kids. It's a gift.. and let the gift be your only motivation.. Know your friends well enough that you know what will help them... thats big stuff right there... It will change Your life for sure..

 It just takes time...



Until next time,
Peace&Grease.